Our Emily Louise
I was going to be a Grandmother!
Incredible! Fantastic! Mind-blowingly wonderful in every way.
As soon that Baby arrived, I was going to sing, sing, sing to that Precious Little
One and dance it around the room singing Good Night, My Someone; The
Froggy Song and The Cherry Blossom Song; and 1001 made-up-Grandmasongs.
I was going to be the best Grandma I knew how.
So happy to be invited, I packed my bags and settled into the kids’ house a
week before the due date. What an incredibly exciting time! I readied the
chicken and asparagus I would cook for dinner before my daughter and I left for
what we all knew was going to be the last prenatal appointment. It was indeed.
There was no heartbeat.
Change locations. Change positions. Change the Doppler.
There was no heartbeat.
There was no heartbeat.
The skilled, calm and caring CNM broke every speed limit madly rushing to the
hospital, just in case, please God, please God… although we already knew:
There was no heartbeat.
The UltraSound confirmed it and the world became silent.
The learning curve was impossible. The many hours and people blurred, but
with superhuman strength and determination these brave parents birthed their
Precious-Baby-with-No-Heartbeat. Grief-stricken and in shock, I was of course
honored to help. The skilled and loving nurses guided us, encouraged us to get
cameras, kept the waiting heart-broken family members informed, loved us all.
The skilled, calm, and caring CNM helped my daughter… because the Baby
could not. And then she helped settle the new family in the bed together to
choose a name…and weep.
When we were invited back into the room it was almost as if there were a golden
glow around that bed. The new parents beamed through their tears and said
“We’d like you to meet Our EMILY LOUISE.”
We’ve always said she was perfect in every way… but one. When my turn came,
I held her close, feeling her precious beautiful face on my neck, and I slowly
dipped and turned and sang, “Good Night, My Someone, Good Night, My
Love…” I was a Grandmother.
It was 20 years ago this January 31. I can still feel her in my arms.
Judy Mieger, Grandmother to 7 Beautiful Grandchildren
Camano Island, WA
Please visit what we call “Emily’s Bench” in front of the climbing structure at the Green Lake Playground in Seattle. Sit for a moment, if you have time, and watch the children laugh and play.
January 20, 2023