Seven years ago Chris, my husband, and I found out we were pregnant with our baby boy, Noah. When we found out, I remember thinking I must have a false positive and called every doctor who could see me that day. I stumbled upon Dr. Walters who confirmed I was definitely pregnant. I began bawling in his office thinking how Chris and I’s lives were going to change forever.
Fast forward 35 weeks and I started experiencing a lot of back pain. (No one had ever mentioned anything about back labor and I was not aware this was a thing!) I went to see Dr. Walters (who had become family at this point) and I was dilated to 3cm! I was immediately hospitalized for 3 days and after things had stabilized I was released and sent home on bed rest for 2 weeks. Up until this point I had a very healthy pregnancy. There was no reason for me to be in preterm labor our little boy just wanted to come early! After I hit 37 weeks, I was officially considered full term and off bedrest! We went for a walk and I went right back into labor. By the time we got to the hospital I was dilated to a 6! I spent about 8 hours in labor when the doctor came in to break my water. Everything was moving along great and everyone was very healthy!
Everything started to change once my water was broken. Noah started going into distress. They assured me this could be normal after the water is broken and continued to monitor me. The next few hours happened so fast and are a blur. From what the doctors tell me, Noah’s hand came out of my body gripping his umbilical cord. Once the cord is out, the body thinks baby is out and the placenta starts detaching, meaning my placenta was rupturing. Noah and I were now both in distress and I was rushed into an emergency C-section. I did not have time for pain medication and was in the worst pain I would ever imagine. Protocol stated that the doctors save the mother before they start saving the baby. By the time they had me stabilized enough to get Noah out his heartbeat was 70. They took me into recovery and the doctor came in and told me they had a helicopter from Children’s in route but Noah had already been without oxygen for 45 mins and if he survived echmo his quality of life would be severely decreased. The team finally decided to cancel the helicopter and called time of death. I remember screaming to God and questioning him as to why he did not answer my prayers and save my son. Dr. Walters ended up quitting OB and the whole team and our small town were devastated.
We spent 3 days in the hospital with our son on ice. We have an amazing photographer who took pictures of our time with him. I remember going through the motions and trying to pretend it didn’t happen while still having a gaping hole in my heart. The worst part was when we had to announce to our friends and family who were excitedly waiting Noah’s arrival that Noah was called to Heaven too soon.
Looking back I am able to see how such a small boy who only lived 2 hours on this Earth was able to bring a whole town together. We were surround by more love then we could ever imagine. Seven years later I still don’t know why God didn’t save my son. However, I know that God is good and God has a purpose for everything even if I cannot comprehend it. Noah’s legacy will always live on and we are so honored to be privileged to carry Noah’s story with us.